Getting Through Mother’s Day without Mom
When Mother’s Day is approaching, and your mother is not around for any number of reasons, it can be incredibly painful. Many on our team here at Moloney Family Funeral Homes know exactly what this feels like.
Whether you’ve lost your mother to death or estrangement, or are unable to get together due to pandemic-related restrictions, a sense of grief and unmet expectations threatens to descend like a dark cloud.
You brace yourself preparing for the rush of “Love You Mom” social media posts and advertisements. You find yourself envying those who have a close relationship with their own mother. Your mind drifts to what might have been if life had turned out differently.
This May, more families in the greater New York area are feeling the ache of separation. That’s why we want to ask this question: If your mother was with you, what would she want you to do on Mother’s Day? Even in the midst of so much uncertainty, even as you’re unable to go about your “normal” routine, what would your mother say to you right now about how to spend your day?
If you’re a mother yourself, she would likely hope you’d enjoy your own children, letting them celebrate you.
If you have a favorite meal, she might say, “Make it!” A favorite coffee, “Drink it!” A restaurant you’ve heard good things about, “Try it!”
If you gain a sense of peace while spending time in nature, she’d want you to take advantage of springtime in New York and head outside.
If you have special people in your life, she might encourage you to reach out to them. You’ll be surprised how a good old-fashioned phone call can put a smile on your face.
At Moloney, we spend our days talking with those who have lost loved ones. We understand the importance of moving through grief – not avoiding it, ignoring it, or distracting yourself with busyness. This Mother’s Day, we encourage you to move toward those who love and support you. It’s tempting – especially right now – to isolate. But it’s never been more important to connect.
Take this as an opportunity to acknowledge your feelings – even the uncomfortable emotions that catch you off guard.
Think about what your mom would say to you. Minute by minute, hour by hour, Mother’s Day will come to a close. It’s our hope that you’re able to celebrate her memory, her legacy, and who are you because of her.